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Eva C Scanlan @ThatEvaOne NYC via Ireland.

Dubliner in New York. Theatre & Events Producer: @terranovaNYC, Darling & Company, #24HrDub @abbeytheatre. All controversial/hilarious views my own.

1,084 Following   529 Followers   7,969 Tweets

Join Twitter 5/6/09

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@bendreyfuss You should read @redlemonader's piece-by-piece deconstruction of #50shades. Splutter-laugh funny. http://t.co/xS3osvaY4A"If we forget history, we are doomed to repeat it," I scream at cool teens wearing chokers and floral shirts with cut-out shoulders.
Retweeted by Eva C ScanlanMy Mac makes these 'bloop-bleep' noises occasionally - it's trying to tell me something, but WHAT? #WhatsThatSkip? #TimmyFellDownTheWell?
@LauraVogel Yeah - not a thing.@LauraVogel To be about, or relating to something? This tweet is concerning stupid people... How else do people use it?@LauraVogel For me it's a more recent thing. Sounds v incorrect to me. Cf @lysol's '#healthing' campaign. NOT A THING.I've never heard the word 'addicting' until about 6 mths ago, and now it's everywhere. Made up? @guardianstyle: 'Addictive' or 'Addicting'?
@TophHooperton I hate the way they make you stand and watch before you get free stuff. #GimmeNOW.@redlemonader Obvious slaggings aside, you have to agree that Jamie Whatshisface is easy on the senses.V excited about the new SVH recaps that I have to catch up on, but serio, WHEN is @redlemonader going to deconstruct the #50Shades trailer!?
Happiness is (a) remembering your password on the first go (b) already having your CC details on file. #LittleThings@Farniboy29 I wouldn't be a fan of the raspberry ripple AND chocolate combo, now. Tis one or the other. I'm a classicist. :)Well-jel though!@talktoBOI All sorted! Thanks.@Farniboy29 This 'Mr Softee' lark isn't fooling anyone!@Farniboy29 Nice one! I'll try and find one here... FrozenYogurt is NOT a 99, New York. Wake up, sheeple!Jaysus, I'd kill for a decent 99.In Focus: Ohio Replaces Lethal Injection With Humane New Head-Ripping-Off Machine http://t.co/w8F43xyyYX http://t.co/YemndOzSK4
Retweeted by Eva C ScanlanHey you! You with a play! Want help developing it?? http://t.co/c3pWzY1MoU
Retweeted by Eva C Scanlan@talktoBOI Can I get a number to call re home insurance from outside of Ireland, pls? Thanks!
I just bought some books.I would die happy if I never heard the word 'grommets' again. :/@TophHooperton Exciting. :)Listening to the Empire Records soundtrack. It's all so very mid-90s. #Angst@AnnaVanValin The ABSOLUTE worst. Shudders.@AnnaVanValin Pipped, surely, when you specifically say 'no pickle' (cos pickle is pure evil), and they put pickle EVERYWHERE. #picklejuiceYo, iTunes. What part of 'do not ask me again' is tricky for you? We can go through it piece by piece if that will help.
You say 'consultant', I think 'snake oil salesman'. You say 'import/export', I think 'mid level drug dealer.' #CareerGuidance@TophHooperton BBB? Is it on-ish? :)@MeganKosmoski Oh, mais oui. I may have to pop out but you have keys, right?Folks who take 'non-selfie' selfies in their car, do you REALLY think people believe someone else took your pic from beneath your gearbox?
@JasonSimms ...is a little girl's thhichken.@JasonSimms https://t.co/akuFivhfhf #chickens #notchickensDear @Apple autocorrect: This week I'll be #TECHING. Not 'etching'. Teching. Though I might wish I was etching, I will, in fact, be teching.'We are savvy to the dark arts.' Yes we are, @JasonSimms. Tell no one. #AhButSureListenFlashback to something that happened on Friday night. #wine@MeganKosmoski TURRIBLUR! Check your messages. :) FL missed you too.@MeganKosmoski SorryBoutIt.@MeganKosmoski Ooopsie. I totally jinxed you. :/ My bad.@MeganKosmoski You're so close!@OwensDamien Hey, I only take orders from ONE guy... Now if you'll EXCUSE me, I have fish to fillet.@OwensDamien Thanks. I'm sure we'll be very happy together.@1970RobD @OwensDamien @ExpressandStar DIBS!Me, on phone, being entirely unhelpful: 'H as in hotel, Q as in... queue...?'The @DubTheatreFest programme looks amazing. Would love to plan a sneaky trip home. https://t.co/1Mibox5c3I@annieryanwest Amazing!I sure like being inside this fancy computer.
The new @Audi ad where the Audi driver is considerate and non-assholic is so for from reality, it's remarkable.@AODhubhshlaine NOPE. Shut that DOWN.@AODhubhshlaine What fresh hell is this?@AODhubhshlaine What are you feeding him?@AODhubhshlaine You should never have named him. This will only end in tears.@killianmccrea No one will ever believe you.@killianmccrea You'll be cut out of my will... for reasons which are well known to you. xo MD.@killianmccrea AGAIN? Dagnabbit.So the very tip of my right index finger is ever-so-slightly tingling and numb. It's cancer, right? #WebDiagnosis
Having a hangover is bad enough. Having a hangover while standing in line for 90-minutes at Ikea on a Saturday afternoon is... not great.Ouch.Innocuous evening with Midwesterners . outoftowners = quality jokes + Chicago humour = tame, non dunker-punchy jokes. ;) + Irish people =?
@aoifhayes No actual eating, just nom-nom-nomming their paws and faces. So, yessss?Bad mood, great mood, bad mood again. People need to not talk to me today unless they can present me with a basket of kittens first.
I have about a thousand, no lie, photos of clouds, sky, and an airplane wing. Photos I will NEVER look at again. And yet, they stay.After a week of acting the dick, and facing the promise of a lobotomy (forcible HD removal) my old laptop is now on its best behaviour. Hmm.@BeccaTheSM Cutingtons!@BeccaTheSM I did not. Hold please...@miss_susanboyle @amazon Corporations are not people too! :)@BeccaTheSM Excuse me while I google images of dogs. Good day, sir!@BeccaTheSM Yes! I'm slightly obsessed with doge.@BeccaTheSM No, no, Becca. Much YOU. *points. winks. nods approvingly.*@BeccaTheSM We really DO put the world to rights via Twitter. Pat selves on back.@BeccaTheSM Welcomes...?@BeccaTheSM Woah, reel it in there, friendo!@BeccaTheSM Aw girl, we're WAY beyond 'Best'.@BeccaTheSM Ha. My sister got a 'Best regards' from her husband before they were married. YOU CAN'T BELIEVE THE TALKING DOWN THAT REQUIRED.@BeccaTheSM Totes profesh! I had someone sign-off a business email (total stranger) with 'xo'. Obviously a force of habit. Made me gigg.@BeccaTheSM I saw it on a signature 'Thanks you for your business!' and on an Amazon order! So odd! But you can totes pull it off. :)@miss_susanboyle Which is expected of a human, but @Amazon?!That's twice today I've seen 'Thanks you' in a business setting. Is it a typo, or meant to be a cutesy 'thanks, youuuu!' #ThanksYou@BeccaTheSM Decision made, and with 57 minutes to spare. Thanks Doll!@BeccaTheSM Found one. Now begins the hour-long debate in my head over which color to pick. Clear or Grey. Help? http://t.co/fmBPfLC1jzElaine Stritch. Still planning on being her when I grow up. http://t.co/qDVq17D43z@BeccaTheSM You have a case for your Macbook, right? Where did you get it - the Apple Store? :/To the last human on earth playing Bejeweled Blitz, who is also sitting on my bus, turn the volume down, you're embarrassing yourself.
@TophHooperton Dude. You have no idea. Away from my hard drive right now, but I'll sling you a vocal test shortly! :)@BeccaTheSM Shockin lazy, altogether.@BeccaTheSM Exactly. I always warm to people who figure out 'Scanners' is my name of choice early on. I've never liked 'E' though. C'mon.@BeccaTheSM I know - really I should be more understanding for the time-sensitive gentlemen of New York. (It's always men, it seems.)@AODhubhshlaine Really? I propose a less wanky alternative. MahBeh, maybe.People who say 'The Scottish Play'... oy.Total strangers who call me 'E' in emails. a) We don't know each other at all, and b) You're not in that much of a hurry.@AODhubhshlaine OoooOOOOOOohhhh! http://t.co/dTQi0Xd72U@TophHooperton Heida payl! I found the Schnede-Anglysh Diktionarie. #Titbagels #Superkewl #2008 http://t.co/pMuswCm8nJ@AODhubhshlaine @MrShaneDelaney *Gentle, non-threatening BBC voice* If YOU have been pressured into an arranged marriage, call the police.Checking the fine-print. ('Clause 3i(c) will HAVE to come out.') Remember this @AODhubhshlaine and @MrShaneDelaney? http://t.co/41CirUigoQHey, has anyone figured out what causes déjà vu yet?Remember when people used to bust their holes to be the first to write 'first' in comments? Is that still a thing?Go see @Ivytheatre's excellent play #Donkeypunch written by @MichelineAuger directed by @Audrey_Directs @sohoplayhouse!
Retweeted by Eva C ScanlanHe's poured his curves into a trouser. http://t.co/7cvxPhqtuO
Retweeted by Eva C Scanlan
@AODhubhshlaine Ok hang on, getting a pen... "Magazines," you say... Ireland...UK...And what was the other one? On it. You sit by the phone.@AODhubhshlaine Sure. What do I need to do?@AODhubhshlaine @craiguito NOW I am.
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