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UNFETTERED AND UNFILTERED FAKE CHARLIE STRONG

0 Following   12,547 Followers   3,088 Tweets

Join Twitter 1/6/14

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.“@T_Cizzle_10: how do you pronounce Soso's real name?” Soso is a fake name is he a spy seriously.“@TexasExSTP: You lost your top QB commitment this weekend. What's the plan here?” Any QB over 6'5" cannot be trusted they are devious.@CoachJim4UM IDFWU.“@bobcat_180: which rocky movie do you like?” There's more than one are you serious.“@stuleach: how do you feel about gentry going to Michigan?” I feel like he should bring a coat.“@JPLinPhilly: Coach, do you ever listen to the "Rocky" soundtrack?” When don't I listen to the rocky soundtrack.“@NathanThornhill: only if it has whey protein and spinach” Uh what else would it have in it choco chips do I look like a terrorist.“@NathanThornhill: If Kyler doesn't end up in Austin I have 1 year of eligibility left. http://t.co/N9SiJaAo0g” Whoa do u like cookie cake.@TravHaneyESPN you say things.“@TEXAS_TRU3: ahhh coach... maybe you should cool it w/the OVs. Another bad flipping wkend.” Or is it.“@rverduzcojr: hey coach...KNOCK KNOCK” WHAT.“@TakeshiS2K: Yo coach, is it true that the best defense is an even better offense?” That's like a black hole of doesn't make sense
1/25
2015
.“@Katie_BBFan: I know ur busy w recruiting & finessing, but do u have thoughts about our offense next year?” I never think about offense.“@LonghornGK: Just saw you walk into the hoops game. How come you can't get better seats?” Basketballs like ballet seats don't matter.“@jdplant: why are these horns down at the Erwin Center? http://t.co/42aS9lbIXd” That's got Bob stoop written all over it.“@perrylegate: How do you think we matchup against the Kansas Mockingjays today?” Don't care I'll be there playing angry birds or whateverThese Aggie say Daylons Mack is too short to be good but thats ignorant people used to say I couldn't dunk & it's true but nevertheless.“@CornellEJones: who you got Turbo or Ozone?” Uh turbo obvi.“@TacoFetus: What's your favorite movie?” Breakin' 2 Electric Boogaloo.“@TexBornNRaised8: did you take this picture? http://t.co/KmCh7QKAdw” Are Malik and Daylons really that big seriously@cuppycup what.“@JacqueK1982: coach is this a three piece suit I see here? #Finessin? http://t.co/dJrcJg2Vji” No that is just a hoodie.“@JBTexasEx: We need to up our dessert game, coach. Lodge a cake w icing. http://t.co/gK7TKJvzi0” That's fondant son tastes like playdohAmerican pickers tonight #finessing
1/24
2015
Cookie cake cookie cake cookie cake cook I gotta little old recruit on my hook.“@JBTexasEx: http://t.co/Ie5OfWLg2h” Okay that is NOT REAL. I would never hit a ladyI can feel it comin in the air tonight.. BA BA BA BUH BUH BUH BA BUH BUH BUH.“@Gonzertons: Coach do you cut back on workouts to make time for recruiting?” I see words but I don't understand them.“@dafuture210: how u get Daylon Mack to come to an official visit coach?” 🍪.“@dafuture210: what's your stance if a aggie ask you for a autograph??” Feet shoulder width usually.“@JBTexasEx: the boys @TexAgs have started calling you "Charkie".” It's probably a term of endearment I buy a lot of mulch from those guys.“@Katie_BBFan: Coach, what's your stance on deflated balls?” Work out don't juice and it won't be a problem.“@SeanM20: coach, how are you convincing Soso to commit?” 🍪.“@Drewpotticus: Remember when your nickname was "3 star Charlie"?” No.@CoachSumlin uh oh.“@chucksandropers: I heard Cookie Cake was your pet name for Wickline, any truth to this?” No that is a lie his nickname is Tiny Nose.“@TexasExSTP: Any more surprise recruit visits?” HOW WOULD I KNOW IF ITS A SURPRISE.“@stuleach: is kyler trolling us?” Just because somebody is short doesn't make them a goblin come call me a goblin to my face.“@IPutMyHornsUp: Coach, what do you think about the canoe sculpture on 24th & Speedway?” Sculptures r made of clay that is not a sculpture.“@rverduzcojr: yo coach, start telling recruits that UT has the the number 4 pharmacy school in the nation...” Why isn't it number 1.“@Katie_BBFan: Coach! you're using emojis now?!” What is a mojiBraveheart was sad I think about Braveheart when we're losing games and then I'm like you know what Charlie you don't have it so bad
1/23
2015
If Jamaboabo is like hey coach are you pursuing any other RBs I'll be like only so-so get it lol laugh at loud 🚣.“@TXStronghornFan: Would you eat this? http://t.co/qxLMBaYKjd” Yes only without the bread and more chia.“@LonghornHolden: You think Watson's pleats or sweater vest reel in Locksley? https://t.co/zX2CCrZGO0” Pleats say I am a good man trust me.“@bigup2dahorns: Hey what's on the schedule today with @Soso_Jamabo1 ?” Short 2 hour leg workout & then maybe nibble some giant HEB cookie.@ZGentry_11 Ur gonna go meet Harbraugh? All me & Kyler did was talk & maybe shared some giant HEB cookie that's all it didn't mean anything.“@UT_HookEm: How do you think ole sumblin is sleeping tonight?” Oh he always sleep good if you know what I'm saying glug glug.@CoachSumlin I promised that little old Kyler Murphey we'd list him at 6'3" in our media guide did you think of that no you didn't I did.@TheKylerMurray did you enjoy the spinach hot pockets.@CoachSumlin Me and your recruits are having a slumber party tonight wait that came out the wrong please delete twee.“@Hsquaredx: @ChuckFnStrong coach WHERE ARE YOU TAKING KYLER TONIGHT” He asked if we had a Dickxie Chicken whatever that is.“@PaulHook_em: Kyler Murray, DaMarkus Lodge & maybe Daylon Mack? http://t.co/yIieqWc0qC” I am sorry I was all hopped up on Gin-Gins
1/22
2015
.“@TheKylerMurray: http://t.co/J7ZaYbqNmy” Is that real my pants just got kind of tight emotions confused.@DeeChilllin hey r we good I heard u were maybe gonna go play for stoop if that's true at least flip to auburn & be handsomely compensated.@CoachSumlin Got a brand new fax machine so.“@russwm: Coach do u need to borrow a step ladder so u can have an eye to eye talk with Gentry?” That is rude also a step stool would work.“@ThatsNotHandy: Coach, are you gonna watch the #sotu speech tonight?” Nah he called me earlier gave me the lowdown.@AuburnU do you have drive through tellers do you have those vacuum tubes those are neat do you give out lollipops are your tellers nice
1/21
2015
.@AuburnU how much is your service fee to withdraw money also do you offer free checking.@CoachSumlin you old sumblin.@TexAgs oh and before you ask no you cannot plant a garden in the giant dump our team took in the bowl game.@TexAgs I ordered compost from you guys like 2 weeks ago what gives.“@loganhaff_96: how many HEB cookies will it take to get Tim Irvin back?” HEB cookies too good for that kid anywaysa giant HEB cookie is $8.99 so from now on all recruits will receive 700 giant HEB cookies that's gotta be worth $5000 on the street.“@MeatCutter122: what kind of stretches do you do for sore quads?” Leg presses, rear lunges.“@JacqueK1982: Harbaugh is going after Zach Gentry what r u going to do?” I'm like hey zach I already had all these doorways lengthened so.“@TexBornNRaised8: Coach how are you gonna counter when Auburn is giving $$$$ signing bonuses?” I'll be like hey we have heb cookies so.“@MPAggie02: Only hollow cores are ur 5 values @ChuckFnStrong: .@HEB do u sell giant cookies with hollow cores” Aggie at least u try hard.“@ScottMcChillin: enjoy 6-7 at least you have core values” U aggie love talking ethics until someone else lives by them then they're stupid.@HEB do you sell giant cookies with hollow cores.“@willrmalm: did we lose someone else?” I don't know probablyI really thought the giant cookies from HEB would do the trick I mean.“@ScottMcChillin: Barry Sanders” what.“@ScottMcChillin: because most lions can run farther than 60 Yds.” You know a lion that can't run 60 yards seriouslyApparently Tim Irvin is a dynamite baby sitter http://t.co/VIyBB1FlRT.“@BigHec01: Who's this hairy B-E-A-S-T? http://t.co/KaQV5w0v6h” Back in the day that mustache was known as the panty dropper in 14 states
1/20
2015
.“@ScottMcChillin: This tweet gained more Yds than tu did in its bowl game. Enjoy ur 10 team Big 12.” Tweets r measured in yards r u serious.“@ScottMcChillin: This tweet gained more Yds than tu did in its bowl game. Enjoy your 10 team Big 12.” R u serious we only have 10 teams.“@ScottMcChillin: This tweet gained more Yds than tu did in its bowl game. Enjoy your 10 team Big 12.” What does Tulane have to do w it.“@VincentMannnnnn: What is Sumblin doing with Holton? http://t.co/ZwTPlcXjUm” Using him as a human shield to hide that big old belly.“@Hsquaredx: Chuck what's you're favorite thing to do in Austin?” Go to Wheatsville coop and select herbs and legumes hard to beat that.“@Katie_BBFan: Coach are sweater vests the new mock turtleneck?” No they are totally different things.“@TEXAS_TRU3: Coach, where ur Horns at? http://t.co/qck0O6mMyN” Behind that big old badass tight endI'm gonna be honest w u I dont understand recruits anymore they all just say fam & bae & juice & I just nod and say is this about footballToday is MLK Day where we reflect upon all he did to protect people's rights even though he was unable to integrate women into Aggie CheerBet you didn't know that if you had more than one LeGarrett Blount you'd have multiple LeGarretts Blount haha anyway I should be recruiting.“@GundersonNathan: You actually watched the bowl game?” Yeah the parts where I didn't have my eyes shut so actually no I didn't watch itWow I'm almost as bored watching this as I was watching our bowl game
1/19
2015
.@AaronRodgers12 Did that loss feel worse than that time in 2005 when Texas went to the Rose bowl instead of you anyways hope you're good.@CoachWMuschamp You sly old will mousechamp I would drop kick you if I hadn't already committed to a nonviolent lifestyle.“@alexrievman: coach why did Louis brown decommit during his visit lol” Lets just say he thought he was core value-proofPeople say Charlie why can't you get Kyler Murphy he could be another Russell Wilson and I say Wilson has thrown 3 picks today smart guyBusta rhymes with the pickHad a huge recruiting weekend gained two verbal decommits think theyre pretty solid.@NBrossette oh oh oh and also we have beignets* . *(low carb no fat no sugar or flavor high protein).@NBrossette hey uh COINCIDENTALLY I found out our athletics cafeteria just started serving jambalaya étouffée & gumbo for breakfastIt's 3:38 in the a m and I'm sautéing some tofu cubes for my post jog snack you gotta get up early to keep that old worm outa Charlie's beak.“@Dustin_Cody: Maybe time to put pads on @TexasMBB players..see how they handle the pigskin?” They can barely handle the basketball skin.“@beansnryson: Kris Boyd is sitting a few rows behind me. You want me to pass him a word?" Ask him when he'll put out his top 19 schools
1/18
2015
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