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I agree with AD steve Patterson that a clean start is needed and he should fire himselfWhile Rick barn will be missed by his longhorn family his meerkat family rejoices at his return.@Uber Rick barn will meet you out back no return tripWell they fired that old Rick Barne I felt a kinship with him bc of his hate for offense #RIP
.@neiltyson if the sun is a star then why doesn't it twinkle smart guyTexas swimming is ranked number one but ask any aggie and they're all yeah well our guys are swimming across the pacific RIGHT NOW.@OU_SAE come over here
In going to buy an MP3 player are MP3s smaller than CDs are mp3s compatible with my Walkman how many can fit behind my sun visor.“@TexBornNRaised8: Coach, what do u think of this Kentucky fan? http://t.co/ZFVN4nYSqS” Oh look red mccomb got marker on his faceI wonder how many cameramen died during the filming of the documentary game of throne by the time those dragons got big.“@BigHec01: If TexasRelays r this wkend when r the Baylor, TCU, Tech & a&m relays?” Thats a trick question those schools don't have trackWhy does everybody you talk to in this town have beards and tiny hatsWait so Kim baysinger is marijuana I don't understand she is a person but Tom pettys wants her to be drugs how can a person be drugs.@XUAthletics you can listen to all the DMX you want so long as it's old DMX that's my DMX we have a connection.“@Aggie_E: And texas is as hulled out as its ever been. They will be blessed to win 5 games.” You old aggie talkin about boats lol
To rebuild you must first destroy -JesusWe started practice yesterday these two guys collided and I was like BOOM and they were on the ground and I was all THATS FOOTBALL anyways.“@Taylor_Gaspar: Strong said he would run a dual-qb system if they need to.” Yeah a duel to see who starts although they'd both prob miss
Asked my daughters what a one direction is and they pointed to a poster of these five girls on their wall and I'm like ok big deal.“@bfolsom18: What else goes in this list? http://t.co/aNzTfgzs7k”Sumblin BAC.“@mezzy08: Coach, what do you think of Malik? Zayn Malik that is leaving One D.” What.“@MollyStier: How do you feel about Zayn leaving One Direction?” What are you even talking about that said looks there's two directions.“@IPutMyHornsUp: Afros make you look taller. Just saying.” An Afro would make you look faster
Pope did a miracle huh well make me a saint cause I won 6 games last year.“@HunterHaglund: Coach, what are you looking at in this picture? http://t.co/UHkUGqCvsE” Malik had a XFL shirt on.“@ChristineHookEm: Are you so excited about Pro Day today?!” Are you serious that's today I am at marshals buying bicycle shortsThey call it crossfit bc youre angry you threw out your back and the trip to the ER made you miss American pickersMarch Magnus
.@TexAgs do you think these snails ever look around and think they live in a giant forest http://t.co/FWHh6DmGeEWhen do we start spring ball.“@IPutMyHornsUp: Do u think some of our women's basketball team want to join the football team?” We already got enough ladies on the teamWhy do tennis players all go kissing their trophies all the time it's like that show where that guy loved his truck and married it.“@Katie_BBFan: Coach, for fun do you ever tell the team that Clear Eyes Full Heart Can't Lose?! Say yes!” No
.“@TStiffSports: Coach do you think you could've recruited this guy? http://t.co/Bf0q3NvjfW” Uh why to win a math championship no thanks
.“@abby_loves_cats: What kind of tree is this? http://t.co/veqp6vRC3P” I don't know but somebody put all the game of throne heads on itBaseball can't call it spring training if c c sabathia weighs 400 pounds at the end of it.“@ChristineHookEm: did this song make you cry? http://t.co/ez9D08y9E5” Uh no I don't cry at songs unless it's kiss from a rose by seale.@TexAgs are roses poisonous.“@Katie_BBFan: Coach, lock Justin Tucker in so he can't leave. http://t.co/sEVbdrJaih” Maybe I'll take his feet give em to old goofy hair
.“@chucksandropers: what were you looking at when this picture was taken?” Probably a fat kid or a place kicker http://t.co/Hhv2LAzY2eBasketblargThere are no double dribbles in football unless you catch sumblin before a 11am kickoffSomeday our football team will put up points in the forties maybe not this year or the next but some dayLet me get the door for you kind sir POSTERIZEDGetting beat by a school for butlers I mean.“@CowboyTD: Hey Coach, do you love bottled water as much as Rick Barnes?” I'll drink it straight out the side of a hose I don't care.“@BDavisAAS: If you can explain Texas' slow-it-down, shoot-a-bunch-of-3s game plan, I'm all ears.” It's like punting and I'm all for ityou old Iowa steakButlers doesn't stand a chance because Luke axtell cannot be contained.“@BarkingCarnival: 3-14 is the new 5-12.” This is great can 6-7 be the new 10-2 let me know.“@TSC_HookEm: “@justinwells2424: March Madness in Texas. http://t.co/xDr8XZ9pT9” Where's Aggy, coach?” Behind that old curtain maybe.“@chaseluce: coach, who do you have in your final 4?” Magnus ver MagnusonWait we are playing just some butler that's GREAT we'll be all oh sir please fetch me a earl gray tea OH IM SORRY CAM RIBLEY DUNKED ON YOU.“@pepper0325: Hey coach, what's the motto for 2015 season?” PROBABLY BETTER THAN LAST YEAR.“@skywade27: coach, ever thought about doing stand up?” What I stand up all the timeI don't mean to nitpick but aggy basketball really underperformed this year get it nit pick because NIT lol laugh at loud.“@JordanTreuter: Hey are you gunna make this kid an offer in a few years? http://t.co/anTun0Kg0B” Do you have his cell
.“@ZHassanali: who would you rather see as Notre Dame QB to start the season; Golson or Zaire?” We will see the game in America not Egypt.@CoachSumlin I mean seriously how do u get a good kicker do you talk to them in French or give them sweets or ask them about their feelings.@CoachSumlin how do you recruit kickers asking for a friend and to be honest that friend is me.“@JesusInsideTex: Thoughts on The Hulk, Kendell Jones? http://t.co/tgOMzQKMWF” Where's Kendall all I see is a steg o saurus with a hair doI'm going to grow a mustache to help me get in w the high school coaches.“@TexBornNRaised8: see the irony Coach? http://t.co/dFDMo3hDAI” Is that a great white you must be very strong
.“@IPutMyHornsUp: How many pushups can u do w Wickline on your back?” U ever see Wickline on my back it better be bc he's trying to drown me.“@ChristineHookEm: are you doing anything fun for Spring Break?” Yes.“@tonymataya: Coach do you agree with this recruiting method? http://t.co/bjyDHs2wgG” What
What seed is the football team in the tournament when is our first game I hope we play Kentucky they are terrible.“@Katie_BBFan: Hey Coach, what do you think about that UCLA coach who was suspended with pay?” He refused to shake Coach Snyders hand.“@ZHassanali: Coach, do you have any upsets in the NCAA tourny? Who's in your final four?” Uh in what sportPeople say Charlie what does your bracket look like and I say it is kind of gray and metally looking and has a bench press bar in it why.“@bfolsom18: Washington Post made a new Longhorn emoji you can use. http://t.co/GXwyvURcUF” Somebody's hiding behind a muffin.“@tmoore8606: you just lost a follower” I found you.They call it march madness because you have to be crazy to like basketball
.“@ChristineHookEm: U have a man crush on @Official_MalikJ?!” We crush everyone in the weight room so I have a man crush on all my players.“@ChristineHookEm: are you with @Official_MalikJ at the Nike camp? http://t.co/GIt5OKHYwn” Malik wears sunglasses bc his smiles so bright.“@GBHunting: Interactive 3D tour of 2015 Kyle Field http://t.co/TVO1VHKYda http://t.co/1qIJr5AmRJ” I see it is a game day tour as well.“@the_prestone: How would you have kept Demarco Murray in Dallas?” I would have been like hey we don't really need you reverse psychology.“@bfolsom18: what if it's a chicken protein paste pie” No crust right then okayPie day are you serious you people disgust me
Don't tell Moorer the holiday isn't about himAttention recruits all the racists are in Oklahoma and in the SEC there are no racists in the state of Texas.“@brintly: Picking flooring for the kitchen: stone, ceramic, or porcelain?" People pick out their own floors are you serious.“@IPutMyHornsUp: Would you rather win a national championship or be six inches taller?” Do you want to be six inches more knocked outer.“@TexBornNRaised8: Coach do you listen to any Metallica?” Mack Brown Anchoring Me All that I see Ultimate Fatties.“@TroyJohnsonLH: hey coach are you superstitious? http://t.co/m96MtRlJRJ” Yes that is why I always call a false start on first down.“@EvanKirschner: Coach, is there anything at SXSW you're looking forward to?” The end of it unless biz markie or positive k or DMX show up.“@rockman1297: Coach what do you think about TCU, Baylor, & OU being predicted as the Top 3 in the Big 12 this season?” Top 3 Runners up.“@Katie_BBFan: Coach, what do you think about all the people in town for SXSW?” I think they should go Back to vaud ville
.“@CowboyTD: Coach, are you excited about Run DMC coming to Dallas this fall?” Are they bringing arrow smiths.“@zackmorris7: Championship. You know, what we should strive to win every year.” You talk in riddles like a shaman.“@zackmorris7: Coach can we win the national this year? I got some bets going.” The national what.“@GBHunting: I'd hoped we'd give Chavis bigger living quarters.” Yes where is his pizza oven is it behind one of the waterfall.“@WWMcClyde: RT @zach_barnett: Sumlin insisted on steam room. http://t.co/YkYcMTbm5N” Is that couch where they do their recruitingPeople say Charlie do you think that loss to Iowa Steak hurt worse than the bowl loss to Arkansas and I say no bc we were never in that one.“@Katie_BBFan: Coach, why is "Wow Texas" trending on twitter?” Bc people are like wow Texas has a lot of wind farms probWe snatched defeat from the jaws of certain defeat.@ISUMayor32 how would u like to be mayor of the Erwin center if you know what I'm saying asking for a friendI have never lost to Iowa SteakBarne gonna barnes I mean.@Uber you can pick up Rick barn in about 20 seconds at the back of the sprint center put it on my tab
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